Do you know you must stop feeling self-conscious if you want to succeed in your life?

Most of you are so self-conscious about yourself that you feel everyone is analyzing you critically. You literally cringe within yourself in embarrassment thinking that you are being judged negatively. You also feel that people are passing not-so-good comments about you.

You are wrong in feeling so.

No one has the time to judge you, as everyone have their own plate full of problems.

So, you must stop feeling self-conscious and begin to feel confident about yourself.

You were not self-conscious when you were a child, were you?

Why is it so?

As a child, you were not bothered about other people. You made yourself happy by concentrating on what you liked doing.

But as you grow, you change according to the people you live around. And when you face many problems in your life, you become cowed down by its magnitude.

• You might face persistent failures.
• You might be thrust aside as not worthy.
• You might be consistently rebuffed and insulted.

If you are basically confident, you face your problems with guts. But if you are basically timid, your problems makes you terrified to face your life.

And when you do not have the courage to face your life at its harshest, you have all sorts of complex about you.

And one such complex is low self-esteem. When your self-esteem is at its lowest, you feel you are not good enough. Thinking you are not good enough makes you shy and self-conscious.

Yes!

Having a low opinion about you makes you feel very self-conscious and uncomfortable in the presence of others.

Some people are self-conscious about their appearance which they feel is not good enough.

For some people, their low social status makes them feel lesser.

For many, persistent failures make them feel very low and self-conscious.

The most common reason behind your self-consciousness is that you are too worried about other people’s opinion about you.

Most of you never feel normal when you enter a room full of people you are not familiar with, isn’t it?

You are so self-conscious that you feel everyone is looking at you, analyzing you, and having unconstructive thoughts about you. So, you freeze into immobility and become tongue tied to interact with people.

You are wrong.

Why should people make low comments about you?

They have lot more personal work to do than to keep analyzing you. It is you who think that others are making negative comments about you, when in actual fact they are worried about their own personal problems and issues.

What are the different reasons you feel self-conscious?

• If you are unlucky to have an impairment, you brood about it and feel that others also think lesser about you.
• When you are unhappy about your appearance, you become self-conscious about it.
• When you are mingling with high status relatives\friends\colleagues, you feel very self-conscious about your low social status.
• When you face consistent failures and defeats, you are very self-conscious before people who are more successful than you are.

This is a wrong way to lead your life. You must stop feeling self-conscious if you must carve a niche for yourself.

I have a friend who has a very manly voice. If you close your eyes and listen to her, you will be sure that you are talking to a man. But this impairment has not fazed her at all.

“I was born with this defect. I cannot be bothered about it and if someone finds it odd, it is his problem, not mine” would be her confident rejoinder.

Believe me, everyone has got used to her voice now. No one looks at her oddly. Even if they do, my friend never shows that it is affecting her in anyway.

You should be like my friend – Self-assured and bubbling with confidence. Like my friend, you too should develop a good opinion about yourself.

Do you know what happens when you are self-conscious?

• Your body language becomes negative and gloomy.
• Your eyes become shifty and wavering.
• You fidget with your fingers and hands.
• You keep shifting your legs.
• Self-consciousness makes you very inhibited and nervous.
• It makes you desist from interacting with people.
• You become silent and morose.
• You lose your assertiveness and confidence.
• And generally, you make yourself sick with depressive thoughts.

Very sad indeed!

What do you lose when you are self-conscious?

• The main thing you lose is your happiness.
• You develop a very low opinion about yourself.
• You are sure that others have negative opinion about you.
• You lose enjoyment in life, as you feel shy to mingle with people.

What exactly should you do to stop feeling self-conscious?

• You must definitely come out of your shell of negativity.
• You should not pay too much attention to the opinion of others.
• You should be completely focused on being self-confident and self-assured.
• There should be no second thoughts in you that you are a worthy person.
• You should never over estimate others.

How do you go about overcoming your self-consciousness?

Look at the mirror.

What is the reflection you see?

Do you see a glum face staring back at you gloomily?

Then you will not like yourself. It is your inhibitions and lack of confidence which makes your lips pull down with dejection and depression.

Now for a change, smile and tilt your head with confidence. Comb your hair and straighten your dress.

What is the reflection you see now?

You see a confident person who has an easy smile and so will be liked by other people.

How does this change happen?

It is the same mirror and it is your own reflection. One reflection had the look of abject dejection and the other had the look of cool confidence. Always choose the latter.

Well-groomed look will definitely make you stop feeling self-conscious.

When you are well-groomed, you feel confident and assertive. When you are well dressed, it gives you a feeling of satisfaction.

The confidence a well- groomed look gives you is endless and limitless. It transforms your image to the outside world and induces a feeling of goodness within you.

Can you see how your confident attitude makes all the difference in your life?

When you try being confident, it gradually becomes your second nature. Never ever, think that others are better than you are. If you do so, you feel inferior and self-conscious.

Why should you place others in a pedestal and place yourself in the rock bottom?

No one is better than you are. It is your assumption that others are better than you are that is making you feel self-conscious.

You should think that you are a worthy person and you are capable of being competent and efficient. No one can degrade you except yourself.

When you degrade yourself and think that you are worthless, you lose all assertiveness and become intolerably self-conscious.

CONCLUSION

 “I used to care about how other people thought I led my life. But lately I’ve realized that most people are too preoccupied with their own lives to give anybody else even the scantiest of thoughts.” –Douglas Coupland.

Yes!

No one is bothered to think about you. And so, you should not lose your peace by giving others overdue attention and concentration. You should focus your thoughts on you and make efforts to make your life worthwhile.

Wasting your life, by making others dictate your life is an extreme mistake you are committing. You should come out of your shell to see that the world is wide enough to accommodate you.